I can't stop thinking about Microwaveshiz lately. Most everyone on here knows we had something between us. It was amazing, and I've never felt more special.

I know he gave up "the community" as it were, and I'm not judging him for it at all. I'm glad he had a chance to patch things up with his mom and have a better relationship with her, I truly am. If he's happy, then I'm happy.

I guess I just really miss him. His company was so comforting, and he made me laugh. He did tell me that him and his mom were growing closer, but even though we were really close, I never knew it would make him give us up. Since "The community" is how we met, he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore.

It just makes me sad. I've been in a weird stupor since, and I just can't seem to get out of it. It's not so bad as it was at first, but it still hurts.

I've written a couple of drabbles about it, since writing usually gets me out of a mood, but they turned out horrible, and I'm still in a schmuck.
*Big sigh* This is just my rant, I'm not looking for pity or anything like that. It's just writing usually helps, so maybe instead of fiction, I can do a diary of sorts.

I've exhausted most of my usual methods for getting out of a funk like this. Any ideas? I've considered trying to talk to him, but I don't him to think I want to drag him back to something he doesn't want anymore. And its not even about the whole "scene" anymore-I miss HIM. Plain and simple. Even without that.

I dunno. Ranting and cuddling my dog seem to help a little. I guess I just haven't given him up yet. Supposedly with time it will get better, and I suppose it already is starting to help, but I just had to get it off my chest. Feelings suck, sometimes, ne?